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Category Archives: marriage
How to be an awesome partner.
Of course this list is far from being exhaustive. But exercising these 9 simple things can strengthen and flourish your relationship. Not only will you create a more loving and accepting environment but you’ll both notice a shift in your mood, behaviour, and reactions to each other. Always choose to see the best, believe the best, do the best, and be the best for each other.
©2017 Susie Lee
Emotions are good indicators.
I came across this today and I absolutely love it. Sometimes, it’s hard to decipher how we’re feeling, let alone why. Our emotions aren’t without reason, they’re trying to tell us something – that we need to either let go, make a change, heal, face our fears, or do something.
Let’s use bitterness as an example, how many times have we blamed other people for how they’ve hurt us? Instead of taking the time to look within, we’re quick to punish, take revenge, give the silent treatment, or make them feel guilty. This may cause temporary relief but it’ll never bring true healing. Our bitterness never justifies rude behaviour towards those who have hurt us. And the sooner we acknowledge that we’re responsible for our feelings (despite what has been done to us), the sooner we’ll find healing.
Our emotions are usually good indicators as to what’s going on inside of us – so listen to it and make the necessary changes within. And if reconciliation is needed, then have the courage to reach out to the other person. By no means do I want to simplify the hurt that has been done to us but this ’emotions definition chart’ is a good starting point to identify how/why we’re feeling so we can begin to make positive choices towards living our best.
©2016 Susie Lee
Someday. Someone.
I absolutely love, love this! Because somebody somewhere out there needs to read this, know this, and believe this. You’re perfect and more than enough for that someone out there. Even your flaws and imperfections will be beautiful to them. So don’t settle. Don’t change to be loved. Don’t compromise. It’ll be worth it because you’re worth it. So until then stay the way you are, and let them find you.
©2016 Susie Lee
Keep going or move on?
It’s a fine line to know whether to keep going or whether to move on – it could be a relationship, goal, or work. I wish there was a formula I could give you but only you can figure that out for yourself. There isn’t a cookie cutter answer because what works for one person might not work for you – since everyone’s in different stages of life with different mindsets, different emotions, and different circumstances.
The thing I would suggest doing is to take the time to do some soul searching. Ask yourself some hard questions and be honest with yourself. This will help you to re-evaluate whether to continue or to move on.
Here are 5 questions to ask yourself:
- Why did I start this? And does this answer still apply today?
- What do I really want? And what am I going to do about it?
- Am I just bored and want change?
- Am I putting unnecessary pressure on myself?
- What are my core beliefs and values? And does it line up with what I’m doing?
Or it may be as simple as that you’re just tired, and that you need to rest rather than to quit. Rest, rejuvenation, and restoration can do wonders to your psyche.
Wherever you are (or going) on your journey, I wish for you peace, joy, and fulfillment.
©2016 Susie Lee
Expectations = Frustrations
Expectations. We all have them. We expect someone to do something. We expect something from someone. It’s okay to have them but it’s not okay to impose them on other people. This is unfair and sometimes, very cruel. Of course we’d never admit we impose expectations on others but a sure way to know if we do is when we experience frustration and disappointment when they don’t comply.
Expectations stem from our own needs. Period. It has nothing to do with anyone else fulfilling them or not fulfilling them. Our expectations come from our fears (or insecurities) within us. And overtime, we adopted an unhealthy pattern of looking to others to help us cope with our fears. This pattern of thinking is not only self-destructive but will also destroy relationships. Our expectations will suppress their freedom of speech and choice. They’ll comply to our demands out of fear, and not out of love.
If you’re in this place now, it’s time to do some soul searching. Ask yourself some hard questions: Why do I feel like I have to do this? Why do I feel like they have to do this with me? Why is this important to me? What would happen if I didn’t do it? What am I afraid of? It’s unrealistic to expect others to meet your needs. All you can do is share your need and release any obligation of meeting them. It’s okay to request but never demand. But you have to accept the fact that the answer may be a ‘No’.
May we look for answers within first before we expect it from others.
©2016 Susie Lee
Be happy now.
Be happy now – not when you get the promotion or find the love of your life. Be happy now, for our lives are made up of moments. And each moment, we’re given a choice – we can choose to be happy or unhappy. Yes, even despite what has happened to us, what we’re going through, and even what may happen to us. Every time, we have a choice. Choose to be happy. It’s a powerful choice because we’re choosing the outcome of the situation rather than letting the situation determine the outcome of our lives. And when we choose to be happy, we’ll find freedom – freedom from critics, failures, and fears. And ultimately this happiness will give us the freedom to be who we’re meant to be and we’ll excitedly embrace each moment that comes our way.
Be happy with who you are, as flawed as you think you are. Be happy with where you’re at, for this moment will never come again. Be happy with what you have, for it’s in your wants that creates unhappiness.
Be happy now. Not tomorrow. Not when. Not later. But now.
©2016 Susie Lee
The Four Agreements by don Miguel Rui.
The Four Agreements by don Miguel Rui are simple concepts yet profoundly effective. When applied to your life, it can be absolutely transformational. You will experience more peace, joy, love, strength, and energy. And you’ll soon realize that at any given moment you have the power to change the outcome of a situation, conversation, or feeling – simply by incorporating these four agreements into your mind, actions, or words. Once you make these agreements with yourself, they’ll become second nature to how you think, feel, and respond. For an in-depth look into The Four Agreements, you can pick up or download a copy of his book here.
©2016 Susie Lee
How to push yourself out of your comfort zone.
One of the sure ways to grow is to get out of our comfort zones. I know it’s not always easy because we’ll experience discomfort, insecurity, or growing pains. But getting out of our comfort zone will challenge us, stretch us, and shape us. It’s purpose is to develop and strengthen us. Sometimes, being open minded and being willing to see things from a different perspective is half the battle. Here are some ways to get you out of your comfort zone.
©2016 Susie Lee
Choose to be happy. It’s a new day.
Our lives may not be perfect and we might even be bogged with worry or stress. But no matter what’s going on in our lives right now, we can still choose to be happy at this very moment. Each new day is filled with possibilities, hope, and redemption for things that were lost, stolen, or broken in our lives. We might not be able to change our situation right away but we have the ability to change our demeanour instantly. Instead of walking in the light of the past or living in the reality of what is, we need to train our minds to walk in peace and joy in the midst of life’s storm. We can’t control others or change our circumstances but we can control our attitude and our reactions to them. Do yourself a favour – choose to be happy today.
©2016 Susie Lee
living your best 