How to remove stumbling blocks from living your best.

JRR tolkien

Living your best will change from day to day. It doesn’t mean having it all together or being happy all the time – it means doing your best under the circumstances that you’re in. Here are some ways I remove stumbling blocks from living my best. By no means is this an exhaustive list but it’s a start…

  • Don’t hold onto grudges – it’ll only damage you and hold you back from fully living and loving.
  • Work on building your character – keep your word, show up, and work hard.
  • Be kind. Always.
  • Stop being a people pleaser.
  • Work hard and mind your own business.
  • Don’t run away from pain but learn from it – it’ll make you stronger, wiser, and build character.
  • Dream big and follow your heart.
  • Don’t let anyone define you, especially your boyfriend or girlfriend, husband or wife.
  • When you say ‘yes’ to someone, make sure you’re not saying ‘no’ to yourself.
  • Get to know and love yourself – embrace imperfections & brokenness because there’s beauty in those places.
  • Discover the world, especially the world within you.
  • Learn to love those who are difficult to love, this alone will either make you or break you.
  • Have hope, faith, and love.
  • Always believe the best, say the best, and think the best.
  • Don’t compare your chapter 1 with someone else’s chapter 20.
  • Always do your best even when no one’s watching.
  • Don’t settle when it comes to dating – you’re worth the best.
  • Learn to forgive others but especially yourself.
  • Having a good attitude will make all the difference in the world.
  • A bad attitude is like a flat tire. You won’t be able to go anywhere until you change it.
  • Life always offers you a second chance, it’s called tomorrow.
  • Loving is the hardest and the best thing we can do.
  • You can’t start the next chapter in your life, if you keep re-reading the last one. Let go & move on without regrets.
  • You can’t move on to the next chapter of your life, if you keep re-reading the last chapter.
  • Stay humble.
  • Never stop learning.
  • Be thankful everyday.
  • And it’s okay to not be okay. You don’t have to be happy and have it all together all the time. Let that emotion sit with you.
  • Remember that your struggle is just part of your story. And one day, your story will inspire someone else.
  • Lastly, do more of what makes you awesome!

What are some ways you live your best? I’d love to be inspired in hearing from you!

©2013 Susie Lee

Let pain be your teacher. Lean into it.

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Pain - lesson

Everything’s gonna be okay

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Everything's going to be okay

How to be happy

Being happy is all relative. What makes me happy might not make another person happy. So do something that brings you life, joy and makes you feels energized. It’s important to incorporate things into your life that makes you happy because it keeps you in the moment and takes you out of your head. Feeling this way will give you a natural high, a mental and emotional break from the necessarily mundane daily tasks of your life. It’s also very therapeutic as it helps you to cope and conquer the battles you fight within and out of yourself. Whatever it is that makes you happy, may it draw you closer to embrace the fullness of life and to those around you.

©2013 Susie Lee

How to be happy

Living under the shadow of not being good enough

Good Enough. Believe it.

Whether you’re a spouse, friend, parent or child, you may sometimes feels as though you’re not good enough because of how they treat you or how they say things to you. As a result you may feel insecure, insignificant or inadequate when you’re around them. And eventually fear will slowly begin to set in and you’ll try everything in your power to be ‘enough’ for them. But unfortunately your actions, motives, and thoughts will be driven by fear instead of coming from a place of love, freedom, and security. You wonder if you’re enough, you wonder if you’re making them happy, and overtime, you subconsciously begin to hide your true identity for fear of rejection or conflict. Often, you’ll feel like a hamster spinning frantically on its wheel but not going anywhere. At the end of it you’re exhausted, frustrated, and discouraged. And you bitterly realize your efforts are still not enough. You’re not enough.

The hard reality is you can be perfect and meet all their expectations but there’ll always be something that’s lacking in the eyes of the beholder because they’ll always find something else to be unhappy about. So stop trying. I repeat, s-t-o-p! You’re efforts are commendably futile.

Sometimes, people have a way of making you feel small or unimportant because it’s a reflection of what they feel about themselves or what lies within their own hearts. Perhaps they feel insecure or they have trouble loving and accepting themselves or maybe it’s just simply their expectations being placed on you. So remember, how they treat you is NOT a reflection of who you are but rather a reflection of who they are. Unconsciously, it’s how they see themselves and unfortunately they’re projecting this reality onto others, especially those closest to them.

You can’t live for others, at some point you have to start living and loving yourself. Once you begin to love and accept yourself, your confidence and strength will naturally diminish your fear and insecurity of not being good enough. Nothing or nobody will be able to bruise your self-confidence and make you feel unworthy. You’ll be in control of your feelings and you’ll empower your own life choices. You’ll no longer be dictated by what others think, say or do to you. You’ll be immune to their self-destructive ways because you see yourself through your eyes rather than through the eyes of what others think of you. Once you let go of pleasing people, you’ll begin to operate from a place of abundant joy and freedom.

The truth is you ARE enough, more than enough. You’re a beautiful, bright, brilliant and awe-inspiring human being. And yes you’re flawed but in your own perfect way it’s what makes you unique, unmatched and unparalleled to anyone in the history of mankind. Remember, believe and live as though you’re always enough… more than enough. Always.

© 2013 Susie Lee

After a while

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After a While

Definition of soul mate

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Love 1

Letting go is hard but…

Letting go is hard

Sometimes in order to move on, we need to let go of people (or things) in our lives. Occasionally, we have to let go for the sake of the other person so they can carry on with theirs. I’ve found letting go is hard but holding on is even harder. This painful process will tear your heart out and you’ll experience you’re not the same again. Life has a funny way of shaping us through our experiences, people and circumstances. Allow it to change you and reveal the next path before you.

Overtime, the act of letting go will restore your soul, re-balance your life and release your spirit. And the heart-strings that once used to tug so tight are now set free. So throw yourself into the wind and let go. Fall into the arms of emptiness and see what catches you. Close your eyes, walk away and take only the beautiful memories with you. Yes, your heart will ache, long and be desolate but ride out the wave of emotions and see where it carries you.

Trust that life will work out. Have faith that the days ahead of you will look brighter. And have the courage to face a new day. Open your palms and let go… and then wait to see what lands in your hands.

©2013 Susie Lee

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Introvert vs. Extrovert

I Like Being Alone

In my life, there are seasons where I’m an introvert and at other times an extrovert. I don’t believe we can define ourselves as one or the other because we’re gradually changing over time. Our moods are influenced by our outward circumstances and our attitudes are affected by our inner state of mind. We’re also, influenced by the people around us – we may take the backseat around those who are more exuberant than us or take the limelight around those who are quieter than us.

Lately, I’ve learned not to judge myself or put myself in a box. There’s no right or wrong, better or worse, good or bad. Rather we need to learn to embrace the mystery of who we are in the different stages of life. We’re both wonderful and beautiful, simple yet complicated, whole yet broken. There are so many contradictions within us, so many colours of emotions, so many arrays of thoughts, things we do in the shadows of our intent. There wouldn’t be enough lifetimes to discover everything about ourselves because we’re constantly changing. Be self aware but not self-critical. Let it lead you to a place of beauty, truth and love of yourself.

©2013 Susie Lee

“Golf balls, pebbles & beer: An analogy for life”

Golf balls

A professor stood before his philosophy class and had some items in front of him. When the class began, he wordlessly picked up a very large and empty mayonnaise jar and proceeded to fill it with golf balls. He then asked the students if the jar was full. They agreed that it was.

The professor then picked up a box of pebbles and poured them into the jar. He shook the jar lightly. The pebbles rolled into the open areas between the golf balls. He then asked the students again if the jar was full. They agreed it was.

The professor next picked up a box of sand and poured it into the jar. Of course, the sand filled up everything else. He asked once more if the jar was full. The students responded with a unanimous ‘yes. ’The professor then produced two beers from under the table and poured the entire contents into the jar effectively filling the empty space between the sand. The students laughed. ’Now,’ said the professor as the laughter subsided, ‘I want you to recognize that this jar represents your life. The golf balls are the important things—your family, your children, your health, your friends and your favorite passions — and if everything else was lost and only they remained, your life would still be full. The pebbles are the other things that matter like your job, your house and your car. The sand is everything else – the small stuff. ’If you put the sand into the jar first,’ he continued, ‘there is no room for the pebbles or the golf balls. The same goes for life. If you spend all your time and energy on the small stuff you will never have room for the things that are important to you.

Pay attention to the things that are critical to your happiness.

Spend time with your children. Spend time with your parents. Visit with grandparents. Take your spouse out to dinner. Play another 18. There will always be time to clean the house and mow the lawn.

Take care of the golf balls first— the things that really matter. Set your priorities. The rest is just sand.

One of the students raised her hand and inquired what the beer represented. The professor smiled and said, ‘I’m glad you asked.’ The beer just shows you that no matter how full your life may seem, there’s always room for a couple of beers with a friend.

– by Author Unknown