Ok. In my last article, I wrote about how to live without being offended. Since then I’ve had a couple of close encounters. So when I was confronted by another person whether I was offended or not, I had to catch myself from shrugging it off with an excuse. Instead I took a moment and consciously decided to take a risk to be honest and vulnerable.
Fact is we’re not going to be ok with what happens to us or how people treat us. Even though we know we can’t blame others and we’re responsible for our feelings – inside we still feel crappy and angry. In the midst of this, we need to be honest with ourselves. This means recognizing our blind spots and working on them. This will be painfully hard, and at times we’ll fall flat on our faces. But that’s why we need to show ourselves grace. Grace to grow, and time to heal. With each new day we get a ‘do over’ to be a better person, to take another chance, and to be fearless. So instead of avoiding the thing that’s causing us pain or avoiding the person that’s making us feel uncomfortable, we must face them head on until it no longer has a negative effect on us. Be brave, with each moment.
I can almost guarantee there will be people and experiences that will break your heart. It’ll ache with loss or it’ll be broken by betrayal. Our hearts are full of contradictory emotions – it expands with thumping beats when it’s elated and contracts with stings of death when it’s sad. At times, the unbearable searing pain of sorrow rips our hearts apart and leaves emptiness deep within our souls. And so we begin to carry the heavy weight of our hearts into isolation and despair.
We can respond to heartbreaks in two ways, we can make a vow to never give our hearts away or we can risk being vulnerable again – to simply be human. It takes courage to choose the latter.
Let life not harden your heart or let people break your trust in humanity. Let your heartache not paint the canvas of your life with protectiveness, fear and disillusionment – for this isn’t truly living life to the fullest. Rather acknowledge the pain, take time to mourn the loss and have the courage to open yourself up again because life is beautiful, yes, even in the painful moments. I’ve learned that beauty is born out of our struggles, our losses and the excruciating pain in life. It’s what makes us beautiful, sensitive and compassionate.
Allow your heartache to transform you. Let your sorrow enlighten you. And use the pain to make you stronger, not in the sense of being unbreakable but being malleable. Trust me, in time your heart will heal…